01.26.08

And I kind of skirted the issue… didn’t I.

Posted in business-a-go-go, Main, Sale! at 12:48 am by carrie

Yes, I am closing the store.

Yes, I’m going to be in a puddle, on the floor the days leading up to closing the doors. I’ve already had some surprise tears hit me for no reason. The way the floor squeaks, a nail that I remember nailing in the wall at an odd angle, the way the store smells… locking the door after a long day and standing back to view a window display I’ve been working on for hours and hours.

I’m not sure how I’m going to do it…

There was this one day in December… something happened. On my 25th day of working almost every day…. I snapped. I had to get out of the store and look at the sky. Sit and sip a latte. Be by myself. I realized at that very moment that I couldn’t do it anymore… it was overwhelming. Normally, a decision has a 1 or 2 year shelf life for me. An idea/change/opportunity is presented to me and I have to sit on it for 12-24 months. With the store, everything was easy. I wanted a store, I wanted to expand. There was no question in my mind that I couldn’t make it work. But on this day in December… I knew that this chapter was over. And it has felt right ever since. A few people have asked if I’ve lost weight… “Yes, about 60 tons!” (How much does a building weigh, anyway?) If you have ever owned a store, you are nodding right now.

As the news spread (fast)… I have been getting the most beautiful emails. Not one has been angry. All… supportive. Sweet, thoughtful and kind words. And even messages on my answering machine! I well up just thinking about it. You get it… you get all the love I put into this space. You get that with the energy I put into all of this… every tiny square inch has been delicately thought out at one time or another. My spirit lives there.

I wouldn’t call this a mid-midlife crisis… but with that change, a flood of change came with it. I eloped last December. Nathan and I have been together 8 years… engaged almost 3… it was time. And it was perfect, in my humble opinion :) The drive-thru wedding chapel in Las Vegas on a Sunday night. Spontaneous, simple… I wore jeans. It felt right, and it was so “us”.

The other huge change is that we are moving to North Carolina. This has been a subject of conversation for over a year now. My cousin is there with her family, two of our best friends are in the area, too… but that wasn’t the reason to go. Two visits, both with me hugely reluctant and pouting like a baby… the first visit left me hating the place. The second one, even with a terrible cold… I could see the beauty and opportunity of the area. Young families everywhere. It’s really clean, safe…. making all sorts of lists as one of the best places to live in the United States. I’m normally freaked out by any little change… so, I had to push those fears aside. For the first time in my life, I’m taking a leap of faith that this will be good for us. If it isn’t, heck… California isn’t going anywhere. I could go on and on about North Carolina, the Durham/Raleigh area more specifically… only because I’ve done SO much research.

I will continue to blog and list on my website. And, I’m really excited to get back into my art. I’ve been talking about a wholesale line forever, I think this finally gives me the opportunity to give it the time it needs.

I hope that you will all keep in touch, and I can receive updates on things happening in La Crescenta :) There is so much I’ll miss about the store, this little city, California… but deep down, I know I’m doing the right thing for me :)

So, here is the postcard I sent out… click on the pictures to see them larger…



I’m going to miss everyone so much! I’ve made so many friends, and many have become quite dear to me… I’m calling this the best learning experience of my life, and best opportunity of my life. Thank you for taking this journey with me, I really couldn’t have done any of it without all of you :)

12 Comments »

  1. cathy nash said,

    January 26, 2008 at 9:43 pm

    60 tons weighs alot. Hope you’re feeling like a feather. And Raleigh Durham is a wonderful place!
    Best wishes~
    cathy

  2. Art Tea Life said,

    January 27, 2008 at 11:53 am

    Well I can’t type anything right now – I am too choked up…..You wrote this so well. Okay coming back later…..

  3. deborah said,

    January 27, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    My jaw is on the keyboard… I feel, I know, well, I don’t actually know ’cause we’ve not ‘actually’ met but your store, you, your blog, well, yes, thank you, I do have a life, i tend to blog about it sometimes when i have time away from my life and i do ‘visit’ other people who have lives and they too talk about it on their blogs and what’s cool is that while i can’t exactly ‘see’ them living their lives i get to hang out with them in this virtual world, it is great because it brings people together who wouldn’t ordinarily meet or risk meeting or …. oh, and what is really cool is that i get to see their art and it isn’t curated by some bourgeois, well you get what i mean … am i rambling? oh, well, yes, i guess i am because i’m shocked, and delighted and inspired to know that yes, dammit, we can walk away from things that are fabulous BUT inconveniently driving us crazy at the same time and try something else even if it is crazy to do it because why? IT IS OUR LIVES and we can do whatever we want with it provided the government doesn’t, no, i didn’t mean that, but YOU GO GIRL, do your thang, live your life and if you change your mind next year, change it, live in a fabulous trailor and grow grapes “whatevah” as long as you be happy.

    ok, i’m done….

  4. allison cummings said,

    January 27, 2008 at 5:49 pm

    You hated it here at first? Im shocked!!!! lol i thought you liked it! i mean, whats there to hate???? :)

    All kidding aside – you are really doing it. You are living your life! It all feels so raw now, but you have done the hard part….for nothing is sometimes harder then just making the decision. The rest can by trying – but then its all downhill from there. In a matter of a year you have been on more plane rides than you can count, gotten married to an amazing guy who worships you, and are changing coasts – not to mention closing the store. I think when you do get here you deserve some good ole – rest and reflection time. I promise that when it comes to NC – you will be fine. Trust me, as a southern cali girl myself – i cant say that my moves were always easy. But after a while i realized after a trip back home to the motherland (aka cali) that i was in a beautiful place -and that i was lucky to be there. I relish in my clean air and blue skies. I like to see all the stars at night and i love that i can go anywhere at 5pm without hitting gridlock. I like that my front door is usually unlocked – and that my kids are getting the best of everything. (ok and truth be told – i like never worrying about earthquakes….oh how the truth is liberating!!!!!)

    Oh yeah and we dont have any banquet halls here with flashy vegas names. Maybe you can open one?

    Cousin -im here for you 24/7 and look forward to sharing all of these changes with you. You are never alone – and loved by so many. Look at this as the MOST exciting time in your life….because it is!

    Now if i can only get you thinking about babies….only kidding! baby steps.

    Love you!

  5. Daisy Cottage said,

    January 28, 2008 at 6:58 am

    (((Carrie)))
    What a heartfelt, beautifully written post! I can only imagine how many emotions you are experiencing but I know that you are going to be just fine. You will carry your store and its’ sweet memories in your heart forever. Now you can begin another new, exciting chapter in your life! Congratulations on everything – AND welcome to our side of the country! ;-) You are going to LOVE IT!!!!
    xo,
    Kim

  6. Cindy Greco said,

    January 28, 2008 at 11:46 am

    Carrie, I am going to miss you and talking to you in the shop for far too long; I am going to miss knowing there is the “perfect little gift shop right around the corner” where I can ALWAYS find the “perfect little gift”; I am going to miss Meg, and memories of her and Penny on the Moonbounce…

    But I am happy that you and Nathan are starting a new chapter in your lives together, that fills you with excitement and hope. You sound so happy about your decision. :-) I wish you all the best in the world…

  7. Wendy Updegraff said,

    January 29, 2008 at 5:58 pm

    I am so sad (and excited for you) to read this post. As a fellow store owner, I get it!! I get every single word. I wish you so much luck in your next venture…and you will be closer to us so if you are ever visiting FL, please stop by. I feel like I know you through the blog but would love to meet you face to face. Keep in touch!
    Wendy

  8. Holly said,

    January 31, 2008 at 1:29 am

    Wow! Wow, wow, wow! I don’t read your blog for a few weeks, and what happens!? POOF! Everything has changed. And what exciting and amazing changes are in store for you, Carrie! I am so happy for you and inspired by you. I’m so proud of you for taking that risk to pursue happiness – not later, not next year, but NOW. I can only imagine the exciting adventures that lay ahead for you in NC. My only wish is that you keep your cyber-friends updated with pictures and stories galore. I’m sending big warm hugs your way as you say goodbye to Violets are Blue. I’m sure it’s not easy. And congratulations on your nuptials! :)

  9. jenn said,

    January 31, 2008 at 9:00 am

    oh my gosh!! I’ve missed so much in the past few weeks! I’m so impressed with your courage to recognize your need for change. I know great things are in store for you and can’t wait to hear of all your new adventures. Big Hugs to you! xoxo…jenn

  10. Tina said,

    February 2, 2008 at 3:41 pm

    wishing you the absolute best that this new bend in the road takes you upon through your journey.
    want to also invite you to join in the fun give away over on my blog if you’d like to join in.
    ~Tina

  11. Kristina Lynch said,

    February 4, 2008 at 12:31 pm

    Eloquently written my friend “) You should write that book!!!

  12. Ms. A. said,

    February 4, 2008 at 1:07 pm

    I don’t know how you managed to do it all to begin with! But the pictures of your store will be missed. I do hope you continue to “merchandize” your life and share the images. You have a creative flair that is worth sharing with the world!

Leave a Comment